Ugh

I don't think I've ever felt so sick. I mean, I suppose I have, but when you are in the moment it feels like the worst ever. It's like the worst hangover times a million. I know everyone is getting sick of my "sick" posts, I am getting tired of writing them, but THAT is what is going on in my world: Sick, sick, spiders, sick, and sick.

Last night I was so excited to get dressed up and go support one of my very best friends, Tonya', at her fundraiser for Real Options for Women. She was the keynote speaker. It was held at Maggiano's and the promise of a great night out was so tempting that I had to go. Big mistake.

Sitting at the table as dinner was served, I started feeling overwhelmingly nauseous and dizzy. I was burning up, but shivering and a little sweaty. So I tried to stand up and promptly fell back in my chair and almost fainted, knocking the chair over. My legs would not even support me- they went weak and shaky. The lady next to me was an EMT, thank god, and she commented on how pale I was. She said things didn't look so good, and that I should call my hubby. She had me write down all the pills, etc, that I was taking and surgery info, doctor phone number, etc so she could tell the ambulance should we need to call 911.

Finally, I did call Matt and he came to get me, leaving my car at Maggiano's. My doctor wanted me to go to the ER, but I talked her out of it because I know that it will only be more expense, more prescriptions that don't help (and may make things worse) and more laying in an uncomfortable bed while they tell me there is nothing they can do...

So, I came home, went to bed, threw up, went back to bed, cried, cried and cried and then finally passed out. Of course there was the getting up 3 times throughout the night because of all the bleeding, and then this morning, I didn't think I'd be able to move. Matt had to go to work today because it's a busy day and he's already missed so much because of me. I am supposed to go to the dr at some point for MORE blood work. Barf. Right now, I am stuck at home with no car, and feeling like crap.

Poor me, right? I am so tired of complaining and causing such a fuss...but if I can't let it all out here, then what can I do? And thanks to everyone for being so supportive...ya'll help a ton. Love you all!

Cry-Baby

Ok, so I have been such a cry-baby!! It's so ridiculous! I have not QUIT crying all day for more than 5 minutes. And not cute, feminine sniffles with one tender tear...oh no, slobbering, wailing, gushing, mascara-running, scaring the doggies, CRYING.

I made the mistake of watching Adoption Stories and A Baby Story today, and oh my god, can I just say WAAAAHHH!

However, that's not it, the stupid Blue Bell and Hallmark commercials are doing it too. The dogs do it. I think even my lunch did it. The internet not working did it, the trash can did it, reading blogs did it, seeing baby T's picture did it, and so did a song- INSTRUMENTAL VERSION, not even sappy words!

Come on hormones- run your course! Quit making me crave weird things (like Krispy Kreme last night at 11pm when I NEVER even really like doughnuts) and I think I got some pickles the other day, plus I've been totally craving sweet things (not a HUGE sweets fan, would rather have a steak than a cake anyday) and very into Italian food right now (would always rather have Mexican).

ENOUGH!!! I am bawling right now. I have to be somewhere very important tonight and can't be gushing all over the place. If it's not blood, or sweat (from the freakin hot flashes) it's tears. BEING A GIRL KINDA SUCKS SOMETIMES!!!

21 Firsts

I found this from a new blog-friend, L-girl! Thanks for the sweet comments and the HUG- much needed. I loved your blog and thought this looked like fun.

1. Who was your first prom date?
Kevin Spurgin (sophmore, junior AND senior year)

2. Who was your first roommate?
Chris Norman (the horrible EX that stole everything when he disappeared)

3. What alcoholic beverage did you first drink?
My parents said they gave me lots of beer when I was little. I hate beer now. I guess the first real drinks I had were some of my dad’s bourbon and coke. Love those still now!

4. What was your first job?
Child care, what else?

5. What was your first car?
96’ Ford Explorer, bright red, very cool!

6. When did you go to your first funeral?
Hmm, don’t remember when it was, but it was a distant relative. The first big one was in 02’

7. First Kiss?
Apparently I got lots of kisses in kindergarten, and then some at 10 in summer camp, but let’s count Matt Benko at age 13.

8. Who was your first grade teacher?
Mrs. Cole, but she left after the first month on maternity leave, so it became Mrs. Marsh (a teacher my dad had even had in school!)

9. Where did you go on your first ride on an airplane?
Corpus Christi, TX with my grandparents

10. When you snuck out of your house for the first time, who was it with?
Most of the time I was sneaking people in… enough said

11. Who was your first best friend and are you still friends with them?
Umm, I think it was Lauren Thetford. Our moms went to Lamaze together, but we stopped being friends in elementary..she was a biznatch.

12. Where was your first sleepover?
My house, I think!

13. Who is the first person you call when you have a bad day?
My hubby or best friend, Tonya.

14. Whose wedding were you in the first time?
Uncle Dave and Aunt Debby at 3 years. My mom tells the story because even though I was potty trained she made me wear a diaper. It was traumatic to say the least, apparently. LOL.

15. What is the first thing you do in the morning?
Um, pee? LOL.

16. What was the first concert you ever went to?
New Kids On The Block! Seriously, at 10.

17. First tattoo or Ears pierced?
Ears pierced at 10, tattoos at 18, 20, 21

18. First celebrity crush?
New Kids On The Block, all of them, especially Jordan. I had the poster and the big button you put on your butt. Good god, what a stupid thing!

19. First crush?
Maybe we should count Matt Benko again…

20. First TRUE love?
Who else? Matt! There were others before that auditioned and I thought they won the role, but this is TRUE TRUE love.

21. First time you smoked a cigarette?
15, I thought I was so cool. I toyed with the idea for a while, but I don’t smoke now, can’t stand the smell even- yuck.

GRRR!

Four Words: THE SPIDERS ARE BACK!

GRRRR!

Updates: The Doctor Appt

Well, the bleeding has still not stopped. Even with 3 BC pills/day it's only slowed. So, I am going to be weaned off the pills because of the increased risk of cancer, stroke, blood clots, etc NOT TO MENTION these awful migraines. I will be supplementing my progesterone as well. They may want to do another surgery at the end of the week, but I am not so sure I am going to allow that just yet. There will be increased risks of scar tissue and surgical complications...not fun. We are monitoring my blood levels to see how much I can bleed and for how long before I need a transfusion. I really don't want one of those! I am still on the iron, but having some GI problems from that...to be expected. Also, weird side effects from the BC pills have been skin changes, a breakout, migraines, severe breast swelling and tenderness, crying, hot flashes, very scary vivid dreams, problems sleeping, and overall crapiness. (POOR M!!) I am looking forward to weaning off...maybe it will all get better.

Props for Lindsay

Ok, can I just say that I want to totally give it up for my friend and neighbor Lindsay?!?

That chica is a new momma and has been getting up every morning AT 5:30AM for 20 DAYS (!!!) and going to BOOT CAMP (yes, boot camp, people)in this heat!!! I am amazed. If I get up at 5:30AM, not only am I not a pleasant person, but I am not working out that is FOR SURE, and this heat is r-i-d-i-c-u-l-o-u-s....

To read her descriptions of what they are doing...well, hell, it makes me tired by just READING it. Bless her and her bootylicious lil self. Go girl!

SNAPS FOR LINDSAY!

Feeling a bit better....

Well, things have calmed down a bit. Sunday and Monday I had the WORST migraines ever, but we adjusted my hormone levels (again!) and they've calmed down. Today was one of my first days out of the house...I was going stir-crazy...unfortunately it was to a funeral, but at least I got out. I am still pretty weak, and need lots of bronzer to not look pale (LOL) but that never hurt anyone. As of today we are adjusting hormone levels (yet again) to try to stop the bleeding (again!) so I don't lose anymore of my blood volume. It was only 33% when I left the hospital, and I haven't had a chance to build too much up cause I keep bleeding! Hopefully I will not have to go back to the hospital this weekend...keep your fingers crossed!!

It's a busy spa weekend so I need to be on top of my game. I have decided I am making M take me out for dinner tonight since I am on a roll of getting out!

Hope everyone is well, talk soon Love Amy :)

Updates : The Week from HELL

Hey guys. First of all, I want to thank everyone for their prayers, phone calls, cards, meals and warm thoughts! I am still feeling like hell, and have to continue bedrest for a couple more weeks, but everyone's love is making it all easier. I know some of ya'll aren't sure exactly what happened this past week, so I will give you the Cliff Notes version.

Last Saturday, we were cleaning the house and Zoe (our little chihuahua) got apparently bit by a spider or something because she had a terrible allergic reaction and her face swelled up and she looked like she had swallowed a tennis ball. She couldn't breathe and was foaming at the mouth. I freaked out of course, and we rushed to the emergency animal hospital at Custer and 121. We thought she was going to die on the way. It was awful. So we got home, took care of her and went on the look for the culprit (spider, scorpion, or something equally icky) What we found changed the course of our weekend. Apparently, there was a spider sac somewhere that hatched because within 3 days we saw about 150 spiders!! All over our bathroom, closet, and master bedroom, kitchen, etc. They didn't make it upstairs, so we lived up there until the pest people came out first thing in the week.

The same day they sprayed the pesticides, they told us to be careful with the dogs. We were SO careful! We had a rough day on Tuesday, taking M to the doctor for his leg injury, which is now very infected and he had to have shots and all kinds of antibiotics, etc. They said we did all that we could to take care of it, he should have been on meds from the beginning bc it was SO DEEP. So, anyway, Tues night, dinner was a disaster, I had a cyst rupture (ovarian cyst, very painful) and so M went to get to-go food for our dinner while I attended to all the cyst stuff (bleeding, etc) So, while I was in the bathroom, our other chihuahua Darby came in and since I wasn't paying attention, he started licking the floor, and baseboards WHERE THE POISON WAS!!! I thought ok, well he will be alright, WRONG. Another trip to animal emergency for a stomach pumping, charcoal, and shots. That was traumatic.

So, at this point (Wednesday) everyone had been to the emergency room in our little family, except of course me. I had no idea that I would be next. This is where you will want to quit reading if you have a weak stomach:

So because we are working on having a baby, I was put on Provera, a progesterone to help me have regular periods, cause I am not regular. They thought that if I could do that, then maybe I would start ovulating on my own (I have PCOS; PolyCystic Ovarian Syndrome) So, I'd taken the Provera Aug 1-Aug 5 and started a normal period. But then it got really heavy. I've had heavy periods before so I thought, "well this sucks, but I know what to do"

To spare you all the gory details, I eventually started hemorraghing about 12am (really heavy from 8p-10p, then losing pints of blood after that) We were on the phone constantly with my OBGYN's office and finally we all decided to get me to the ER. They had no idea how bad it was. I was losing so much blood, they almost did an immediate transfusion. Our whole house was covered in blood, it looked like a murder scene. I was going though about 6 changes of tampons and pads per hour, but then I couldnt even use them. So, I get to the hospital, gushing blood, and they do all this blood work, get me on IVs and start prepping me for surgery. I had to have an emergency D & C (dilation and curretage, very icky) and then we had to wait for my blood levels to go up to at least 33% of its original volume. Anyway, I finally got home from the hospital very late on Thursday night. I almost had to go back Friday because I was continuing to bleed. I am on bed rest for 2 weeks, no sex for 4 weeks, (makes it hard to have a baby) and can't lift heavy things for 6 weeks. I feel like absolute hell, and I have no energy because I lost so much blood and am now so anemic. I will keep you all updated as to the progress, but i am taking birth control pills every 8 hours to control the bleeding so our baby plans are definitely on hold :(

Again, thank you for all your support. You guys all mean the world to me!!

Stand Up for EDUCATION IN AMERICA!!!

The Gates Foundation (Bill and Melinda Gates) have a mission! They are dedicated to changing the face of the American Education System. Please, please, STAND UP for our children...it affects all of us!

We have fallen to below the top 20 IN THE WORLD in terms of our education! (Kids in other countries could name the first 5 US presidents...the US kids COULD NOT!)
This is unbelievable! Give our excellent teachers a helping hand and get involved to make the government STAND UP and take notice.

This was on Oprah for 2 days this week. It was a wake-up call. We are in crisis! Drop-outs are at an all-time high and we are creating a generation of children that will not be ready for the work force (or college, or life or anything else!) GET INVOLVED.

If you go to the website, they've done a ton of work for you...all you have to do is go to get involved, and send a letter to your governor. They know where to send it and they've written it for you. It takes two minutes. Tell everyone you know!

MAKE A DIFFERENCE! CREATE THE AMERICA YOU WANT!!